Thursday, February 19, 2009

On Every Street

By Judith Garfield

On almost every street in Manhattan you can buy fruit, vegetables, souvlaki, earrings, socks, batteries, and pashminas. On my street/dirt road, I can buy honey and eggs. Self service. Take your honey and leave your money in the coffee can. And although I know local honey has properties that will help my allergies, I miss those earrings.

How did I get here? Here are the facts.

1. I met my husband when we were 16 at the Jersey shore
2. He drove without a license. It should have raised a red flag
3. It didn’t
4. We’re still together
5. We raised two beautiful daughters in Manhattan and I never had any inclination to move
6. I live in New Jersey
7. On a horse farm
8. In a charming old farmhouse (so my husband tells me)
9. In a charming town (charm is highly overrated)
10. Where no one will deliver dinner to me

If I want to eat, I have to drive. It’s twenty minutes to a banana. I always buy too many and watch them languish on the windowsill. I really wanted to give you a recipe for honey banana bread, but there was just too much mixing and measuring involved for the loveless cook.

So instead here’s a great idea for a relaxing beauty treatment. An egg and honey mask. You will need
* 1 egg
* 1 tsp. honey
* 1 tsp. olive oil

Mix one egg yolk, one tsp of honey, and a tsp. of olive oil. Smooth on and leave for fifteen minutes. Rinse in lukewarm water and pat dry.

My skin is soft and glowing. I look radiant and youthful. S. is taking care of dinner tonight so I can relax. I make a pot of coffee and gaze out at my lovely farm/money pit.

I feel content.

Until I realize I’m out of half and half.


Anonymous said...

Hi Judy:

Judging from your picture, that concoction really works! I'll try anything for that youthful, radiant glow. Seems like living on a horse farm has some benefits. Keep up your good humor ---we all need a good laugh in these times.

Anonymous said...

Look at the bright side. At least there are no politiciams living on your street/dirt road. If there were, the coffee can would probably be empty.
Loved your story! Thanks!

Anonymous said...

My husband and I love your blog! He was inspired to make poached eggs for breakfast. I was inspired to shop for earrings. Keep the love out of the kitchen!

Anonymous said...


I love your sense of humor, I think I'll try the honey mask and make sure no ones in site when I put it on.

Thanks for the laughs!


Big Shantz said...

man that is gross but i'll try anything to beat the winter blues.

Anonymous said...

Loveless cook:

Usually, I have egg on my face; but not in the literal sense. I really liked your recipie and can't wait to try it!!

Anonymous said...

Loveless cook,
I feel your pain. Keep 'em coming.

Anonymous said...

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. When life puts a city girl on a farm, make a honey and egg mask. Wisdom for the ages! Thanks for the tip!

Anonymous said...

Hi Judy,
So glad to meet another "loveless" cook. I feel better about telling my mate to marinate our dinner while I go mask my face with your sweet recipe. You too are a honey

Anonymous said...

I liked the fried chicken recipe better although it probably didn't do too much for my face. It did do a lot for my stomach. Your humor is great and you have a wonderful attitude about life. Keep writing!!!!